Maybe...

...this blog will be resurrected in the autumn. I might just have a tour with a band not entirely unconnected to the Anathema family. Watch this space (if you can be bothered).

And speaking of Chris

he related to us a charming anecdote which so far holds the title of "most heartwarming tale of the tour" and displays a level of ingenuity and resourcefulness seldom found in the bass-playing community. When he was a child he and his brother reportedly left a portable cassette recorder permanently armed so that whenever either of them felt the need to break wind all they had to do was disengage the pause button to commit the audio portion of their emittance to tape. When the end of the side was reached they were able to sit back and at their leisure enjoy the experience of listening to a seamless forty-five minute fart. Remarkable.

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Features Texas Instruments Ti-84 Plus Graphing Calculator in Ti-nspire - Yellow - UVG

Texas Instruments TI-84 Plus Graphing Calculator in TI-Nspire - Yellow - UVG

Descriptions Texas Instruments Ti-84 Plus Graphing Calculator in Ti-nspire - Yellow - UVG

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Reviews for Texas Instruments TI-73 Graphing Calculator

Texas Instruments TI-73 Graphing Calculator

Brand : Texas Instruments

Sales Rank :

Color :

Amazon.com Price : $62.99

Features Texas Instruments TI-73 Graphing Calculator

Ideal for Pre-Algebra, Algebra 1, Statistics and Physical Science. 
Permitted and/or recommended for use on SAT, PSAT/NMSQT and AP exams.
Flash technology for upgrading and loading future applications
Graphing calculator for students in middle grades
Large display screen
Easy-to-use keyboard
Stacked fractions
Upgradable with flash software to keep up with changing curriculum

Descriptions Texas Instruments TI-73 Graphing Calculator

Graphing calculator designed especially for grades 6-8. The TI-73 Explorer provides a larger screen alternative for teachers who feel limited by the two-line display of other fraction and scientific models.

The Texas Instruments TI73 graphing calculator is designed for middle-grade students. It has a large screen to help students see patterns and analyze data. It features stacked fractions and data analysis functions that allow students to easily view and edit numeric and alphanumeric data in the list editor. They will be able to plot data in statistics plots including pie charts, pictographs, bar charts, scatter plots, histograms, and more.

This calculator is upgradable, allowing classrooms to keep up with changing curriculum for long-term value. Students and teachers can also download software from the Texas Instruments Web site.

The 64 x 96 screen allows students to explore data, simultaneously see entries and results, and visualize patterns. The TI73 has 32 KB of RAM with 25 KB available for the user and 64 KB for application space.

This calculator is made especially durable with an impact-resistant slide case. It comes with a unit-to-unit link cable, a manual, and a one-year limited warranty.

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Texas Instruments TI-30XS MultiView Scientific Calculator

Brand : Texas Instruments

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Amazon.com Price : $16.59

Features Texas Instruments TI-30XS MultiView Scientific Calculator

Texas Instruments
033317190379

Descriptions Texas Instruments TI-30XS MultiView Scientific Calculator

Appropriate for general math, pre-algebra, algebra I and II, geometry, trigonometry, statistics, general science, and biology; Offers a four-line display to view multiple calculations and answers simultaneously. Easily scroll, review, and edit current or previous entries.

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Texas Instruments TI-84 Plus C Silver Edition Graphing Calculator, Full Color Display, Includes Dummies Manual, Dark Pink

Brand : Texas Instruments

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Color : Dark pink (as seen in the picture)

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Features Texas Instruments TI-84 Plus C Silver Edition Graphing Calculator, Full Color Display, Includes Dummies Manual, Dark Pink

pre-Algebra, Calculus,Algebra 1&2, Biology, Geometry, Chemistry
Statistics, Physics, Pre-Calculus, Business & Finance
color screen, use images, usb cable, dummies manual included
inequality Graphing, Polynomial Root Finder and Simultaneous Equation Solver
Conic Graphing, Cellsheet.vistit education.ti.com/84c/apps

Descriptions Texas Instruments TI-84 Plus C Silver Edition Graphing Calculator, Full Color Display, Includes Dummies Manual, Dark Pink

Full-color graphing caculator with popular TI-84 Plus functionality for math and science.

High resolution, full-color backlit display
TI Rechargeable Battery
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Texas Instruments TI-84 Plus Silver Viewscreen Calculator

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84PL2VSC/CBX/1L

Descriptions Texas Instruments TI-84 Plus Silver Viewscreen Calculator

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Texas Instruments Nspire Cx Slide Case - Dark Blue

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Features Texas Instruments Nspire Cx Slide Case - Dark Blue

Dark Blue
The TI-Nspire CX Slide Cases
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Descriptions Texas Instruments Nspire Cx Slide Case - Dark Blue

TI-Nspire CX or TI-Nspire CX CAS Slide cases.

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TI-Nspire CAS with Touchpad

Brand : Texas Instruments

Sales Rank :

Color :

Amazon.com Price : $129.95

Features TI-Nspire CAS with Touchpad

Touch it - Easy-glide Touchpad operates like a computer with a mouse.
Graph it - The new Scratchpad on the enhanced Home screen allows you to quickly perform calculations and graphs without saving your work.
See it - Split screen allows you to see a math problem in different ways - a graph
equation
table
geometric figure or text.
The student software enables your home computer to function just like the handheld graphing calculator. So you can use the larger screen to easily create
edit and transfer TI-Nspire documents between computer and handheld.
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Descriptions TI-Nspire CAS with Touchpad

CAS handheld with Touchpad technology for calculus and AP courses.

Includes student software for home.

Ti-nspire cas handheld with touchpad. Allows educators and students to explore mathematical expressions in symbolic form

On the home screen you can quickly perform calculations and graphing using the scratchpad.

Also includes ti's first learning handheld with touchpad technology operating more like a computer and making it easier to navigate.

Handhelds can use the ti-nspire rechargeable battery (not included).

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Texas Instruments TI-34 II Calculator

Brand : Texas Instruments

Sales Rank :

Color : WHITE

Amazon.com Price :

Features Texas Instruments TI-34 II Calculator

2-line display calculator
Basic scientific and trigonometric functions
Allows operations with fractions and mixed numbers
Low-light solar power, never needs batteries
Large color-coded keys on a functionally zoned keypad

Descriptions Texas Instruments TI-34 II Calculator

The Texas InstrumentsTI34 II calculator is ideal for students performing basicmathematic and scientific functions. Although it's compact and easy to slipin a pocket or desk drawer, the functions are solid and include a fractionfeature, which enables you to calculate with both fractions and mixednumbers. You can chose whether to simplify fractions automatically orstep by step, and the TI34 is programmed to switch easily betweenfractions, decimals, and percentages. The two-line display lets you to see more of your work, the top entry lineholding up to 11 characters, with the option of scrolling left or right upto 88 characters. The bottom line shows answers up10 digits long with a two-digit exponent. The keyboard is relativelyfriendly, featuring an extra-large equals button and abackspace/correction key. The calculator runs on low-light solar power,working even inside, and includes a one-year warranty.

Combining excellent usability with powerful features, the Texas InstrumentsTI34 II calculator is ideal for students performing basicmathematic and scientific functions. Although it's compact and easy to slipin a pocket or desk drawer, the functions are solid and include a fractionfeature, which enables you to calculate with both fractions and mixednumbers. You can chose whether to simplify fractions automatically orstep by step, and the TI34 is programmed to switch easily betweenfractions, decimals, and percentages.

The two-line display lets you to see more of your work, the top entry lineholding up to 11 characters, with the option of scrolling left or right upto 88 characters. The bottom line shows answers up10 digits long with a two-digit exponent. The keyboard is relativelyfriendly, featuring an extra-large equals button and abackspace/correction key. The calculator runs on low-light solar power,working even inside, and includes a one-year warranty.

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Texas Instruments TI-1795 SV Standard Function Calculator

Brand : Texas Instruments

Sales Rank :

Color : gray

Amazon.com Price : $8.49

Features Texas Instruments TI-1795 SV Standard Function Calculator

Angled SuperView display for easy viewing
Solar and Battery powered to work anywhere
Change sign (+/-) key simplifies entry of negative numbers
Easy keyboard operation
Change sign (+ / -) key
Square root key
Solar and battery powered
Angled display

Descriptions Texas Instruments TI-1795 SV Standard Function Calculator

The classic mini-desktop calculator for home, office, or retail with big keys and a giant SuperView display.

Key Features:

Well-spaced keyboard with large, contoured keys for easy operation

Change sign (+/-) key simplifies entry of negative numbers

Square root key is useful for schoolwork

Solar and battery powered to work anywhere

Angled display for easy viewing

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Texas Instruments TI-NSpire Math and Science Handheld Graphing Calculator

Brand : Texas Instruments

Sales Rank :

Color : White/Blue

Amazon.com Price :

Features Texas Instruments TI-NSpire Math and Science Handheld Graphing Calculator

Ideal for Pre-Algebra, Algebra 1 & 2, Geometry, Trigonometry, Precalculus, Calculus, Statistics
Required or permitted for use on SAT,* ACT and AP* exams
Intuitive, computer-style interface and cursor controls provide easy navigation between screens and functions
Multiple representations offer different views of the same problem, at the same time, on one large screen
Dynamic linking instantly reflects changes to one representation in real time to other representations of the same problem

Descriptions Texas Instruments TI-NSpire Math and Science Handheld Graphing Calculator

The TI-Nspire handheld comes with a snap-in TI-84 Plus Keypad that provides the same keystrokes as TI-83 Plus, TI-84 Plus and TI-84 Plus Silver Edition graphing calculators. Whether handhelds are provided by your school or your students bring in personally-owned units, this side-by-side compatibility between TI-Nspire handhelds and existing TI graphing calculators delivers a comfortable transition to TI-Nspire technology. Inclueds USB cable for software and file downloads.

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Tampere

A hot and sticky gig in a smashing little venue which epitomised Finland for me - clean elegant surroundings, helpful friendly people and damn good food. It was so hot during the concert that during the intermission, in an effort to compose himself, Vincent lay flat on his back in the backstage area. Upon arising he left an imprint in perspiration that I can only describe in the following terms: Imagine Han Solo encased in carbonite, had The Empire Strikes Back been filmed as a gay porn movie....

Doesn't seem like there's much happening until the Leeds Damnation festival on October 24th. Until then, here's some photos:

Derelict station in Osnabruck

Fonofest Latvia

Brits abroad at Fonofest

A Latvian beer engine

Padlocks on a bridge in Riga

Monument in Riga

John and Vincent in Riga

Riga

Matt and our guide in Buenos Aires

Santiago

Santiago sculpture park

Halfords Santiago branch

Monument in Buenos Aires

The Andes shortly before our landing in Chile

Helsinki

Leaving Stockholm for Helsinki

Returning to Stockholm from Turku

Beirut

It seems like we're back home before we've even set off, having flown out Friday afternoon and then back again only a couple of hours or so after the gig. I was in my local pub by one o'clock on Sunday afternoon enjoying a pint of John Smith's. There were a few foreheads on carpets on the plane to Lebanon - it must have been a designated prayer time or something, which makes me wonder if it's a time-zone specific activity or there's a global consensus as to when five o'clock is. If the former is true it must be tricky doing it on a plane, what with having to figure out where east is as well. What if the plane banks mid-invocation? Or you're suddenly one hour further forward than you were when you started praying? I'm sure they take all of that into consideration, and anyway it was of no concern to us - a fan among the cabin crew ensured we had a plentiful supply of beer and vodka, of which Mick took advantage to the fullest, his impassioned discourse on the merits or lack thereof of well-known actor Tom Cruise polarising opinion among nearby passengers.

After ages waiting for passports to be stamped on arrival we found one guitar had gone missing (still at Heathrow when we got back), which was a bit worrying as we hadn't brought a spare. Finnish support "To Die For" came good in the end by lending Danny a very nice Tokai Les Paul for the show - thanks fellas. There then followed a white-knuckle ride to the hotel where we met our Lebanese promoter, a Christian gentleman named, surprisingly, Jihad. It turns out he'd converted to Christianity after being raised in the Islamic faith but subsequently found himself more than a little disappointed by the actions of local extremists. I'd best not go any further into that, though I know what I would have done in his situation.

Jihad kindly took us to Abdel Wahab's pie and mash shop after we'd dropped our stuff at the hotel. I'm prepared to believe him that it's the best cuisine to be had in Beirut. In fact it was some of the finest food I've ever tasted, and I now know finally what hummus is supposed to taste like. What I wouldn't give for a doggy bag right now - some of that perfectly marinated lamb and the spinach with the crispy bits on top, or maybe the stuffed vine leaves and the other stuff with the crispy bits on top, or that sliced sausage.... delicious. The only down side (apart from the whole tiny birds which Vincent gamely tried) was that they brought us far more than we could possibly have eaten. I do hope it wasn't thrown away.

I have to say at this point that of all the countries I've visited Lebanon has the worst driving standards. There really doesn't seem to be any rules, at least not that I could make out, be they speed limits, road markings, giving way to other road users or indeed any form of common courtesy. I saw the odd traffic light but I couldn't figure out what their purpose was within a Lebanese context. Every journey was a pants-shitting experience, particularly the one after the concert when we narrowly escaped being attacked by an unruly mob, our driver thankfully speeding away before they could get their hands on us.

Before soundcheck Vincent was whisked away for an interview on Lebanese TV, and again had to field questions regarding satanic worship and suicide connected to the band's music. Yep, that old chestnut. It seems a local Catholic school had circulated a letter the previous day warning young people not to go to the gig as satanism would be practiced there, along with much taking of drugs and the spreading of the gothic "culture of death". The no cameras rule was a dead giveaway to them - let's keep it nice and secret eh? I'm willing to bet these idiots have never heard a single Anathema track in their ignorant, narrow-minded lives. Honestly, the sooner these superstitious morons fuck off and let the intelligent and open-minded young people, of whom they're so obviously terrified, have a crack at running things the better it'll be for everyone. Why can't people just mind their own damn business? Here's an opinion from someone closer to the action:

http://tony.codealife.com/blog-1/index.php/2009/11/cultural_segregation/

Anyway, there was a very enthusiastic and non satan-worshipping crowd at the (very big) Forum de Beyrouth, half Syrian judging by the cheer that went up. As luck would have it the set for the Lebanese TV show "1 vs 100" was under construction next door so a couple of bits of wood for pedal boards weren't too hard to come by. The local crew were all hugely helpful, the backline technician being a big Anathema fan so his day was made. Guitar tech George also deserves a special mention. It all went very smoothly and the crowd went nuts - it's always a pleasure to work a show where there's an appreciative and passionate audience. At about two in the morning we headed back to the hotel for approximately one hours sleep before the previously mentioned journey home to the pub. During the show Vincent expressed a wish to return to Lebanon in 2010, and to maybe take in Syria and Jordan whilst we're in the neighbourhood. That should ruffle a few feathers. We'll see what happens.

Finally..

..only one more day and we'll be boarding the North Sea Ferry (only ten minutes away from me), bound for the Netherlands and three shows which could not be more welcome for so many reasons. I will be reporting from the bunk so be sure to stay tuned for all the latest news, comment and analysis.

Back in the UK now after a pretty grueling week with lots of travel at seriously odd hours, not very much sleep, and some pretty fine gigs in the middle of it all - this despite all the hiccups described in previous posts (I didn't have much time to write anything much so listing ill-fortune became the default theme for this particular excursion).

Highlights for me included the drinks we enjoyed with the fine gentlemen of Porcupine Tree - Steven Wilson surprising and impressing with his capacity for red wine (and his appreciation of the mighty Cardiacs). We also got rather merry in Poland with Ozric Tentacles who were all very lovely and nothing like the crusty hippies I expected them to be. It's a bit of a family affair with them - Ed Wynne plays guitar and his son Silas takes care of the keyboards (making it a Wynne-Wynne situation in my book). Brandi, Ed's missus, plays bass. Best grub of the trip was the Moussaka served backstage in Athens - another recipe I wouldn't mind having. On arrival at Liverpool the luggage carousel got jammed, resulting in what one band member rather dubiously described as "a suitcase Hillsborough". Hmmmm.

We're off back to Beirut at the weekend, a trip which will hopefully include a visit to Abdel Wahab's fine restaurant, and this time I'll know to pace myself (must save a bit of room for that crunchy sparrow).

Oslo

It turned out the bus still wasn't ready for us so Tim had to find yet another replacement to get us to Norway, and it's a bit shitty to be fair. Still, any port in a storm. It's the first I've been on with bunks three-high so there's not a great deal of headroom to be had, and those sleeping at the top require skills in mountaineering to reach theirs. What it does have is a larger forward seating area and this became the setting for the inaugural Anathema tour bus pub quiz, won by Les and John with a cracking score of nineteen (out of forty - perhaps some of the questions were a bit tough). They won eleven (yes, eleven) Euros to do with as they wish, and Les is going to compile the next one in a week's time. So much more civilized than the previous evening's leisure pursuits. The bus is now fixed and on it's way to rendezvous with us in Oslo, so it looks like we can finally settle in to our rightful home and hopefully stay on it for the rest of the tour.

Saarbrucken

I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that having a "Wales - Land of my Fathers" (surely that should be "our fathers?") scarf on tour is almost as massively useful as Ford Prefect's towel was in the late Dougls Adams' Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. You can kneel on it, stick it in your tool box so the contents don't shift in transit, wipe up beer spills with it, polish guitars with it, wipe a patriotic tear from a bass player's eye with it, and if you're really pushed, wear it around your kneck when it gets cold.

Cheers Felix from Leipzig!

Paris

A big show in the Elysee Montmartre, an old theatre somewhere in this great mess of a city with about fifteen hundred punters expected. Petter is a little nervous, bless him, so I reminded him that all guitarists are show-offs at heart and that he shouldn't have any trouble, being as sickeningly talented as he is.

I've found the perfect use for my Wales scarf, when Jay isn't draping it over his amp in an act of patriotic fervour that is (I thought the surname Cavanagh would have given him Irish ancestry). Anyway, I employ the aforementioned kneckwear as a handy hassock, making the act of kneeling to gaffer cables and pedals to the stage a far less arduous experience.

I write this on a laptop kindly loaned to me by our driver so posts should be a little more frequent for the rest of the tour. Cheers Tim.

Vevey

In a break from the usual format of this page, today's post is given over entirely to monitor man Matthew Rowley's account of his dream of the previous evening:

According to Matthew, our entire entourage were in a narrow corridor in some hotel/theatre hybrid. For reasons unknown, our task was to remove all the plaster from the walls, an act which revealed a bank of soil behind. Using a fork as a digging tool, Matthew himself uncovered a small portal from which countless centipedes began to emerge. Utilising the previously mentioned fork, he pulled out one of the centipedes, splitting the poor thing in half in the process. We took half of the creature to an entomologist who was situated, rather conveniently it might be added, at the end of the corridor, and he confirmed that it was indeed a centipede and that we should put it back where we found it. Unfortunately, before we had a chance to do so, another "fucking massive" centipede emerged, forcing us to sprint for the bus and make a speedy getaway to the next venue on our tour. After some time we arrived at the hotel where our next gig was to take place. It was staffed entirely by people in Edwardian dress (including one particularly sinister gentleman with a pipe), and resembled the famous establishment from the movie "The Shining". We were asked to surrender our passports upon arrival and were given green ones as a replacement. Matthew soon found himself in his attic bedroom where in the corner there lurked a human skeleton. This didn't seem to bother him much as he took the opportunity to speak with some of the other hotel guests who appeared nervous and jittery. Rather worryingly, they told Matthew that if we didn't get the hell out of there we would all be killed and used a fuel for a steam train whose purpose it was to convey the hotel staff to a place where they could find food. Apparently anything was fair game to power the train - a grand piano and sundry items of furniture were seen being stuffed unceremoniously down the funnel.

Intermission. Well, I need one.

Escape became our first priority. The skeleton at this point revealed itself to be Les, who'd been planning an escape by utilising springs attached to his knees (what the hell?). This prompted Matthew to cover himself entirely in icing sugar, a disguise rendering him white in hue, and to climb out of the window and shimmy around the ledge in an attempt to get to the lobby. Upon arrival there, Danny sprinted by wearing a French maid's outfit (??), making good his escape. At this point I appeared, extremely perturbed due to my lack of two green passports which I could exchange for my own, thus securing my release. Still covered in icing sugar, Matthew selflessly and heroically gave his passports to me, allowing me to join my colleagues on the waiting bus. What was Matthew to do? The sinister man with the pipe approached, intent on causing him some serious harm. Matthew then opened his coat to reveal he was wearing rather a lot of high explosives. Calling his bluff, the sinister man appeared nonchalant about our hero's threat, a tactic which literally blew up in his face. Matthew, the sinister man and the entire hotel were gone, the rest of us saved by this noble act of self-sacrifice.

Matt, you need to see a shrink.

RIP Don Van Vliet, aka Captain Beefheart. A true genius.